In honor of Labor Day, I present one of my favorite techniques for meeting new people — 6 Degrees of BBQ
Parties Once-Removed
Research shows that we tend to have lots of things in common (education, values, etc) with people who are tight with our closest friends.
That’s why this is is one of my absolute favorite bits of advice for dating. You know how you always invite the same seventeen people to all of your parties? Bring some new blood to the old gang. With Parties Once-Removed, everybody you invite brings someone that nobody else in the group knows. Think of it as six degrees of separation, only backwards. Voila! You’ll have a party full of brand-new people who already get along great with your closest friends. Think of it as a sort of “people potluck.”
Have a question for Lisa Daily? Leave a comment below.
Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.
Be sure to tune in to Daytime on Tuesday, August 31 when I’ll be talking about Whether or not your camera might be making you less attractive to online daters
Advice for Dating: camera phone = plain jane
One of my favorite sites for interesting little dating tidbits, OKCupid.com recently analyzed about half a million pictures to find out which cameras make you look more attractive, and which ones can actually make you uglier to your fellow online daters.
What types of cameras make you less attractive?
Generally speaking, the cheaper the camera, the uglier you’ll look. Camera phones are the worst, followed by point and shoot. If you really want to look great on film, you’ll need a camera with all the bells and whistles — specifically those with a lot of cool settings and interchangeable lenses.
In terms of attractiveness, the Motorola & Windows phones were the most likely to make you look unattractive. On the flip side, the camera phones that make you look the most attractive are the iPhone and the Sidekick.
Moving on to the point and shoot variety — the Kodak Easyshare rated worse than even most camera phones, while the Leica Point N Shoot actually scored higher than most of the fancy cameras.
The best camera for making you look attractive? The Panasonic Micro 4/3s.
Why is using a flash a bad idea?
According to the study, the flash adds 7 years (softer light hides all sorts of nasty imperfections, which is why it’s always a good idea to use pink light bulbs at home if you’re bringing dates back.) According to the folks at OKCupid, “a 28-year old who used a flash is as attractive as a 35-year old who didn’t.”
Direct flash seems to be the main culprit — this does not apply where light is diffused, or lit by a professional.
How does the time of day that the photo is snapped make you more attractive?
Late afternoon is best, followed by late night. Probably the fact that late afternoon has the prettiest light.
What’s the one setting on your camera that can make you better looking?
Hell-o f stop. The best photos have a shallow depth of field, which means that the subject (you) is crisp and clear, while the background and foreground are all blurred out. The lower the f number on your camera setting, (f/1.4 for instance) the shallower the depth of field.
What did the study find out about the Apple iPhone?
I thought this was hilarious: iPhone users have more sex partners than Blackberry users and Android users — in fact, women who use iPhones tend to have twice as many sex partners as female Android users. It’s less dramatic for men, but still true. Maybe there’s some correlation between robots, Star Wars references, and less sex. Just saying.
XO,
Have a question for Lisa Daily? Leave a comment below.
Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.
Be sure to tune in to Daytime on Tuesday, July 27 when I’ll be talking about How Music Can Improve Your Chances of Getting A Date
Advice for Dating: Girls Love a Romantic Soundtrack
CAN BACKGROUND MUSIC UP YOUR CHANCES OF GETTING A DATE? A new French study reported in Psychology of Music found that women are much more likely to agree to a date when romantic music is playing in the background.
How did the study work?
French researchers studied 87 18-20 year old women. The women were asked to wait in a waiting room — some listening to a love song, others listening to a neutral song. They were then asked to rate two different food products by a man rated extremely average-looking by another group of women, “Antoine.” (Yep, that’s a prize you don;t really want to win.)
The researchers chose ‘Je l’aime à mourir’, a very well-known love song by French songwriter Francis Cabrel which, loosely translated means, “I loved her to death,” You can see Francis working his magic here. For similar American mushiness, I’d recommend Marc Cohn’s “True Companion.”
“Antoine” had the task of asking out the 87 women, all with the same generic pick-up line, “My name is Antoine, as you know. I think you are very nice and I was wondering if you would give me your phone number. I’ll phone you later and we can have a drink together somewhere next week.”
What did they find?
The romantic love song in the waiting room almost doubled average Antoine’s chances of getting a woman’s phone number — 52% of participants agreed to a date while under the influence of Francis Cabrel, while only 28% of women listening to the neutral song offered their digits.
How can music affect dating so dramatically?
There are a variety of theories floating around about that one. It’s possible that the romantic music acts as sort of a prime for romantic feelings — after all, we’ve all been conditioned with thousands of romantic movies with music to match. It’s also possible that the music induces an emotion that makes us more open to romantic possibilities. And, the researchers had already learned that playing romantic music in a flower shop entices men to spend more money. That’s right, women aren’t the only ones turning to romantic mush when we hear the first strains of At Last. (My own personal kryptonite, btw.)
How can we use the study to get more dates?
Well, if you’re working up the courage to flirt with a woman you meet at a nightclub or party, you might just want to wait until a romantic ballad is playing. If you’re planning on bringing a date back to your apartment later, be sure you’ve got a romantic soundtrack at the ready. And if you’re looking to put the spark back in your long-term relationship, you might try playing the song you had your first dance to.
Have a question for Lisa Daily? Leave a comment below.
Get more free dating advice from the dating coach! Sign up for Lisa’s free Dating Tips newsletter and get *5 Secrets to Make the Guys Go Gaga!* We never share/sell your info.
Arm Touching Softens Up Potential Dates 
Smells Like Love! Perfumes That Attract Men
Lisa’s Super Secret Man-Magnet Cake Recipe
6 Things You Should Never Say to a Man
